If you’ve ever had to sit in a room for a prolonged period of time with a large group of people, it’s inevitable that you’ve noticed those quirky little character traits that set apart that one person in a chair from that other person in the other chair. Lecture theatres have proven to be the most interesting examinations for me – the girl from a rural town who, up until this year, was unable to visit The City without pulling out her giant map (I still do this) or blindly following her friends through a maze of lane-ways and crowds (with her hands outstretched like a blind-folded gorilla). The following list is by no means exhaustive, simply the observations of one blogger who really should pay more attention to her lecturers:
1. The Grunter, otherwise known as the kid who is either trying excessively hard to assert his masculinity or who must have something stuck in his throat, like, ALL THE TIME. This dude probably goes unnoticed until you make the mistake of sitting right next to him. Don’t get me wrong, this guy isn’t as far up the irritability list as those people who decide to get way too close to you in the elevator. However, The Grunter can get a little on your nerves if it’s late in the day, or really, terribly early. He is characterized by his tendency to produce a superfluous number of throat-clearings per minute. You’ll leave the lecture with a recurring “mm-mm-hmm-HMM!” looping in your mind.
2. The student taking notes furiously about nothing. Well, this kid just confuses me. I feel for their poor hand! That pen must be screaming in agony! While the lecturer trails off into an entirely irrelevant point concerning some vague reference to a film nobody’s heard of, this student is scribbling as if the prof has just let slip the universal answer to all exams ever and it will be forgotten lest they write it down faster! Gotta give ’em points for determination though.
3. The guy who laughs, giggles or snorts in glee at every remark made about a text. The lecturer makes a statement about a character in the novel, and this guy is delighted. Repeatedly. I deem this only acceptable when concerning Pride and Prejudice, cause, let’s face it, Lydia and Mrs Bennet are the most silly characters in the shire.
4. The one playing online tetris. Yes. I’ve seen this. I’ve also seen Facebook, texting, and photo galleries. I commend these people for being so awesomely nonchalant. I’m too much of a goody-two-shoes to dare have anything other than my notes in front of me.
5. The guy who has contributes as much as the lecturer. He has an opinion about everything, and can never take the hint that he’s been talking for too long when the lecturer tries, in vain, to interrupt his spiel. The rest of the class is left wondering whether he’s a sleep studier or if he’s just read the entire textbook.
On a side note, I can’t stop singing this song in my head because, you know, Carrie Underwood is catchy y’all.